Five Weeks and Preparing!

Hi, everyone,

I wanted to give a quick update on where things stand right now and where we are in this waiting process!

We're about five weeks away from the due date which is 8/24/08.

I spoke with Sabrina, the birthmother, for about an hour last week, and we had a great conversation. I have conversations on the phone a lot with family and friends, but this conversation feels so entirely different. I find myself hanging on every word she says, trying to memorize it so I can tell Ben, and then just process the weight of it. In thirty minutes, we talked about everything from how she's feeling, to what she needs to buy for the hospital, to how she wants to hand us the baby, to her iron and calcium pills and high blood sugar. It still feels strange to be talking to the woman who is carrying our future child. She's conversive and easy to talk to, and normally, I consider myself pretty conversive and easy to talk to, but I find myself stuttering and stammering during these phone calls because I'm SO emotional. I try to push down the emotions and just think about what she's saying and what we're doing, but they come bubbling to the surface and I have to take a lot of pauses during our talks. Here's an example of bubbling emotions...

At one point in the conversation, she asked me again the name we have picked out for a girl. I told her Ava Faith, and we spelled it together on the phone. Then, out of the blue, she asked me if I had a boy's name picked out. Now, this is where I get VERY emotional. For a long time now, I've had a vision of a little boy in our family, and Ben and I have had the name Noah picked out for years. I carry that little wish around in my heart all the time and have asked the Lord for a son someday to name Noah. I asked her why, and she proceeded to tell me that really, the last ultrasound she had was at five months, and they're just not real sure it's a girl. This is an example of the complete unknowns and crazy communication of this process. We've been told in one way or another through this process that it's a girl. She always talks as if it's a girl. So... it may be a boy! There are no more ultrasounds, and we're waiting for delivery to find out for sure. We're excited either way!

Here's what we've been up to lately...

* Having long talks in the dark at night about how we're both feeling at any given moment and how we think things will go at the hospital

* Packing our hospital bag - I think I have everything together for the baby! Now, if we can just get US together.

* Picking up my cell phone multiple times a day to make sure the ringer is on loud and the battery is charged. This is the number they'll call when she goes into labor.

* Making multiple trips to Wal-mart, Target, Baby Depot, Babies-R-Us and Crib and Carriage to buy this and that.

* Sterilizing bottles and pacifiers

* Priming and painting white shelves for the nursery

*Searching for our carseat/stroller travel system. We're looking for Chicco's Adventure system! We've decided to go ahead an buy a one seat stroller for now and a two-seater when Maia comes!

*Making pediatrician phone calls to find out how to proceed once we bring the baby home and what medical coverage she'll be under until our adoption day.

*Communicating with our attorney and the one in Atlanta about various logistics and paperwork.

* Refiling to USCIS in Memphis for our extended approval to bring Maia home from China in 2009

* Getting directions to the hospital.

* Making lists of who to call

* Blogging to keep everyone in the loop

Well, I'm off to continue preparing today! Next, I'm going to sit down with my Streams in the Desert book and seek a refreshing from the Lord. My spirit feels heavy right now with all of this going on. I trust Him no matter how I'm feeling, which is changing moment to moment! My relationship with the Lord is not about how good and stable I am - it's about how good and stable HE is! Whew! That'a relief!