Going Home

His Eye is On the Sparrow was my grandmother's favorite song.

*Arrangements* - Receiving friends will be Thursday night from 6-8 with the service at 8:00 p.m. at Smith Mortuary Chapel in Maryville. The graveside service will be Friday morning at 11:00 at Grandview Cemetary.

Ruth Rhea Lawson Hutsell - My beloved and cherished grandmother.

August 21, 1926 - January 27, 2009

She was 82.

Welcome home, Ruthie. You are now gloriously free. The lymphoma is gone, and the Alzheimer's no longer holds you. You are surrounded by a great cloud of witnesses and by the presence of the Almighty God. I love you forever.

Emily



My grandmother, Ruthie's, journey home is likely going to be today. She's completely at peace. Thank you so much for your prayers for my family. I'm at home with Ava right now taking care of her, but I'll likely join my family later on this afternoon.

Please pray for my "little cousins." Lacy is 22, Wes is 21 and Katie is 17. Lacy and Wes are both in college and will be making the trip home. Katie is here at home. I know this will be very difficult for them, as I remember being their age and losing my other grandparents. We are a very very close family.

Pressing On... and Living

This is Bear who tried to eat the snowman/lady I made! He's a mess!




Hey everyone,

It is true that these last few weeks have had a somber tone and I've been pretty distracted because my family is hurting, but each day brings new hope and life is being lived in the midst of the hurting. Each day I woke up last week, my heart was heavy, but I knew I needed to live each day. I took pictures of what we've been up to. For one thing, it SNOWED in East Tennessee! Everyone going to the grocery store to buy bread and milk finally paid off! We had a wonderful snowy wonderland for a few days, and I decided to go out and build a snowman for Ava while she was napping one day. I used her mittens and her hat! :)

I got down on my hands and knees in the garden plot where the snow was the deepest and just started playing and building. It felt SO good. I need to "play" more often! Bear, our dog, and I got into a snowball fight - well, it was really me throwing snowballs at him because he kept trying to eat my snowman! Anyway, I took some pictures of life this week and wanted to share them with you.

Ava Faith is growing so much! She turned five months old January 21st! She's now sitting up, focusing both eyes on a toy and reaching for it and giggling just a little bit. She also has two front teeth! I'll try and get a picture of those soon. She is all smiles in the morning when I go in to get her, and she is adding so much cheer to these difficult days.

Ruthie is still hanging on. I know that she would want us to be strong and continue to live - really live life here and embrace it. I'm trying to remember that each day as I awake and touch base with my family to hear how the day is going and how my grandmother is doing.

We have so much to celebrate about her life. I love my family so very much.

I sung this old hymn in church this morning. It had been a long while since I had sung it. I belted it out, as I remembered standing in the pews of my childhood church and singing this with my grandparents. What a wonderful song. It's definitely one of my favorites. I'll see if I can add it to the playlist. Some of the hymns I find sound like Gregorian chants, and I need something a little upbeat right now! :)

Because He lives, I can face tomorrow.
Because He lives, all fear is gone.
Because I know He holds the future.
And life is worth the living just because He lives..

Blessings to all.

Emily

Ava playing in her Rainforest Jumparoo and reaching for her frog.



Good snowy morning East Tennessee! Finally!!





This is not a Christmas picture even though it looks like it because, yes, we still have our tree up! I just love the twinkly lights, and it's adding some cheer right now. Am I justifying?



Our Snow Baby - I dashed outside to capture this pic. It was SO cold that morning!



Rubber Ducky



Happy 5 month birthday, sweet baby girl! January 21, 2009! Oh, and Ava is wearing her decorated outfit made by my sweet friend, Cindy Goodson. I was Cindy's 6th grade math teacher many moons ago, and the onesie says I'm Acutie. She painted an acute angle on it. Thank you, Cindy! I just love it! Happy pi day whenever that is! :)



Daddy put me in the sink. :)



We're having a very laid back evening at our house this week! Can you tell?



Ben came home for lunch, and we watched the Inauguration of our new President.

The Courageous Journey Home

*** Updated Friday morning 11:00.***

I just wanted to touch base with everyone and let you know that Ruthie is still very peaceful. Arrangements have been made, and we're still just waiting. I am so thankful that she's not suffering. It's been bittersweet going through photo albums. I just found one of her shooting a basketball that made me laugh out loud. I have such wonderful memories of our time together. Ruthie's 1st cousin, Merle, went home to be with Jesus last night, and I know she'll be a part of the welcoming committee! What a great reunion awaits her!

I'll try my best to post some more pictures of Ava this weekend. She enjoyed her first SNOW and she turned 5 months old January 21st. She's a hoot, and laughed for the first time yesterday while I was feeding her rice cereal. She is bringing my family joy in the midst of this difficult season.

Thank you so much for your prayers.



***Updated Tuesday evening 8:00.***

My spirit is still today, this week as we wait. My family is gathered, cousins in college are prepared to make the journey home, and my grandmother is so very peaceful. I went to see her again today. She squeezed my hand. I held on and on and on. She said "thank you" for water and smiled at her family with a glint in her eye at times. Yesterday, she held her arms upwards toward Heaven awaiting her journey home. If you're reading this, please pray for my family. My family has been through a lot in the last 11 years, and we're leaning hard on each other, the love and support of others and most importantly the hope we have in Jesus right now.

With all that said, in human terms, we're still hurting and not wanting to let Ruthie go.

Today, I'm finding myself at a loss for many words. I'm still. I'm preparing to go through photo albums and pull pictures. I'm asking the Lord for strength and His strong arm to hold up my family, each of us, and comfort our own individual aches. I heard a song by Mercy Me that speaks to exactly where I find myself this week. Songs are powerful in my life, and I have found such great peace in listening to these words.

Word of God, Speak....

Celebrating Mother's Day with Ruthie in 2008



Ruthie meets Ava Faith for the first time, born on her birthday, August 21st.




Hi, everyone,

I want to introduce you to my precious grandmother, who I lovingly call Ruthie. Her real name is Ruth, but I've always known her as Ruthie. Last week, my family found out she has advanced lymphoma, and I'm beginning to say goodbye to one of my most favorite people on Earth, someone who has impacted my life more than she'll ever know. She's heading home to be with Jesus and Paw, my grandfather, who is her beloved Earl. I wish this for her with all my heart as I know how dearly she has missed my grandfather these past 11 years and how much she longs to see Jesus face to face. It's just so very hard letting go and saying goodbye for now. I know I'll see her again someday, and that cancer will be gone, and the Alzheimer's will be healed. She'll be rejoicing soon. How my heart swells to think of her rejoicing in Heaven.

I love my family with all of my heart and would do anything for any of them. We're strong and have been through so much together through the years. We'll stay together. Paw and Ruthie, my grandparents, have been a light for all of us. My heart is simply full and overflowing with gratitude and love for them in my life. They have made a profound difference in my life.

I dedicate this first song on my playlist to my family. The first time I heard Josh Groban sing "You Raise Me Up," the second song on my playlist, I thought about my grandparents and the difference they made in my life. I dedicate that song to Ruthie. We're family forever. I love you all, and I'm always here for all of you.

We are family.

Breath of Heaven, hold us together. Lord Jesus, bring my family your comfort and bring us your peace. Cover us with your love and be the Lifter of our Heads. Hold Ruthie's hand. Thank you for the place you're preparing just for her.

Emily

A January Christmas Weekend

Last weekend, before the shockingly cold 7 and 9 degree temperatures came rolling over the mountains, my in-laws journeyed from Maryland to Tennessee to spend a January Christmas with us. I left all of our Christmas decorations up, even though the needles on the tree looked a little brittle and the pine swag around the door was beyond crispy! Truth be told, all of our Christmas decorations are STILL up because we just love the bright lights and cheer. Surely I'll have them down by Valentine's Day. :)

We had a wonderful time celebrating Christmas with Ava Faith and Grandma and Grandad. It was a relaxing visit, as we didn't do much outside this time but bundle up and walk around the valley, drag a dead limb off of the cedar tree in our backyard and move a foot bridge that had been swept away by last week's flooding. We drank hot chocolate and ate crab and just visited. Remember when people would just sit around and "visit?" I'm adding a new New Year's resolution to my list - to sit around with family and friends and perfect strangers and just.... visit. Smile. Here are few pictures to post today before Ava wakes up!

The new year has begun. I pray that my spirit will be freer this year and I won't be so self-aware. That's a journey for me as it is for all of us. I praise the Lord for giving me counsel and encouragement when my soul is weary and my eyes are bleary. Thank you Lord, for surprise faithful visits from those dear to my heart.

With lots of love to you today.

Oh! I almost forgot! Ben's birth certificate came yesterday from Maryland, and we now have ALL documents needed to send to USCIS in Memphis to continue our quest to bring Maia Grace home from China! Glory Hallelujah!!!

Grandma and Grandad with Ava - all smiles!




Grandma reading Pat the Christmas Bunny to Ava



Grandad helping with Ava's morning rice cereal feeding



Ben and I opening Christmas presents from family in Maryland. This is Ava's first photo album Grandma and Grandad made for her to look at family pictures from Maryland.



Just visiting and hanging out as a family with our neighbor, Sean. We watched the TN Titan/Baltimore Ravens game on Saturday and ate crab dip. Exciting game!



Ava sitting up for a few minutes with her Sophie the Giraffe teether.



Ava bundled up to go for a walk with Grandma and Grandad, Mommy and Daddy and Bear and Maxi. Maxi is Grandma and Grandad's dog who comes to visit with our dog, Bear.



Ava sitting up with her photo album. She is sitting up for a few minutes at a time now!




I found Miss Saki with Ava's pillow that Patty had made for her last fall after she was born

More Christmas Pictures Added!

Hi, everyone,

I went back through my Christmas pictures and added several more of Christmas Eve with my family. Just scroll down to the Christmas and Grace blog entry and scroll down to the new pictures.

I'll post pictures of our Christmas weekend with Ben's folks as soon as I can get them uploaded and sorted. I'm trying my best to get everyone on here!

Have a wonderful day! I'm off to feed Ava rice cereal now...

Bath Time and Scratches

It's bath time!









Hey, everyone!

Here are a few pictures we took the other day of bath time! We always look forward to bath time with Ava. She seems to really love the water. She's getting to the age where we all end up taking a bath by the time it's over!

Also, we had a minor scare the other day with Ava. She woke up from a 2 hr afternoon nap and would not open her eyes and would just cry and cry. This went on for about five minutes, and that's when I decided to call a friend to come over while I got things ready to go the doctor. (I had just gotten out of the shower, too, and had to get ready!) We both just knew it was pink eye after really looking at it. It was really red and watering profusely. By the time we got to the doctor, it was a little better but was still watering. In my mind, I was going through all of the things I was going to have to disinfect when I got home, not to mention thinking of me and Ben getting pink eye, too. I got it a few years back when I was on a field trip with my kids at school. Yuck! No fun.

Well, when the doctor examined her, he found a little scratch below her pupil. She had just scratched her eye. Whew! No pink eye. So, we went home with Children's Ibuprofen and some eye drops to prevent infection. She also wore a sock with a thumb hole cut out for a few days. She's totally fine now - happy as a clam.

It's blustery cold here today in East Tennessee. Temperatures have continued to drop the last few days, and it feels like January finally. We're all still hoping for some snow.

I made snow cream coffee this morning (which is really just vanilla flavored coffee). That may be as close as I get to snow cream this year! Still hoping, though. :)

Yesterday, I trucked over to the mail center to mail our FINAL document to our adoption agency to send to China! I wanted there to be fanfare as I walked out the door, but there wasn't. Just a few leaves blowing across the parking lot and a list of other errands to run. There was definitely fanfare in my heart, let me tell you!

We're awaiting Ben's certified birth certificate from Maryland, and then we'll have everything we need to send to USCIS for them to grant us continued approval to bring Maia home hopefully this year!

I hope everyone is having a great day today and enjoying the fresh new year. Still working on the simplifying thing here. I bought these cute little green boxes to organize my buttons. Maybe I'm going too far? ugh.

Love you all!

Emily

Great News from USCIS!!!!!!!!!!

*** Two posts today! :)



Ben and I are EXHALING right now! We just got the call from Senator Alexander's office saying that USCIS accepted the letter of appeal I wrote a few weeks back!!! To think that I almost didn't do that! Lesson learned - go until you get a no!!

They are going to allow us to continue US approval of our China adoption by refiling an I-600A and sending in birth and marriage certificates and an updated "Ava" homestudy indicating our change in family status. I already have that from back in Nov. Remarkably, I already have the marriage certificate and my birth certificate, too. I hit the ground running and well, yes, panicking, in July when I thought we were going to have to completely start the process over. Ben's birth certificate request process changed, and I now know what I need to do to get that this week!

We are needless to say, overjoyed! This I-800A has been like a nightmare following us around since July. Every time we think we're through it, something else has come up.

So, I will now start gathering the FEW documents to send to USCIS instead of the boatload with the I-800A.

Maia Grace, we're coming to get you in 2009! I love you immensely, and I will always fight for you, knowing in my heart that it is ultimately the Lord's battle, and He is faithful to be our help. Maia, He spoke to me about you long ago in a doctor's office in a chair stained with tears and waiting. He who called us to come and bring you home to our family is faithful. Always remember that truth.

Christmas Pictures and Grace

Scroll down to see additional Christmas family pictures! :)

Waiting for my baby sister, Maia Grace, from China... We might hear something from USCIS today. A dear woman named Heather from our senator's office is making another Congressional inquiry today. Just be calm, Emily. Be calm.



Hey, everyone! Ok. This blog will mostly be pictures as I want to share a lot with you! I promised that I'd share a bunch because I've been behind. :) Between the holidays, China adoption paperwork/fretting and Ava's croup, I've had a lot on my plate. It's drizzling rain here today, and I'm taking the time while Ava's napping to post.

I'm trying to fit in some time just for me each day, and right now, I'm reading a fantastic book called Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller. I'm ever seeking, searching, wanting to get out of comfort zones, grow, learn and be real. Mostly, I'm seeking a raw, intimate relationship with the God who accepts this daughter just the way she is in the midst of my humaness. This book is unlike any book I've read. It's non-religious thoughts on Christian spirituality, and it is really challenging and stretching me! I love that! I don't want to be a phony. I don't want to be "religious." I just want to share the joy I have in Jesus. It's pretty simple, and I try to make it complicated so many times and then find myself in a rut. If you're searching for a book that will rock your world a little, I highly recommend Blue Like Jazz. I'm having a hard time putting it down.

Here are some joyous Christmas pictures to share with you! We had a wonderful time celebrating this year with my family. Ben's family is coming in this weekend to share Christmas with us.

So, once again, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year all wrapped up together! I wish everyone authenticity and the comfort to be exactly who you are this year. You are accepted just the way you are.

Grace.

Oh, How I love grace - poured out, fresh, new, clean every single day for this daughter - me.


This was our Christmas card photo this year. We also had this up on the screen in our church during Ava's Christening. Thank you, Tamyra!






Ava's giggle face. I love it!





Our first Christmas as a family!



Celebrating the Christmas season with our dear Japanese friends, the Suzuis and the Yamanakas. York-san and Ike-san were Ben's former bosses at Denso where he used to work.



Oh, Christmas Tree...



Daddy is really excited about trains, and Ava had fun watching it go around and around!



Trying on cousin Wes's baseball cap with Great Aunt Jill.



Showing off my striped pants with Great Aunt Syd.



Wow, what do I do with all of this paper?



Ava's little Lamb Chop that talks! This was a Christmas present from Great Aunt Syd, Great Uncle Lonnie and cousin, Lacy.



Ava surrounded by presents. I wonder if that big one is for Ava?? :) Mimi and Papa put pictures on it.



This is what was inside! A Rainforest Jumparoo







NEW FAMILY PICTURES

A generation picture of my grandmother, my Mom, me and Ava Faith.



Me and Ruthie together.



A family picture with my grandmother, Ruthie.



Mimi and Ava enjoying time together.



Ben, Dad, Uncle Lonnie and Uncle Rick celebrating Christmas with Ruthie! :)




My Cousin, Lacy, and Ava. I'm so glad Lacy was home to celebrate Christmas with us and meet Ava. Lacy is graduating from the University of Indiana this year!



All smiles - My grandmother, Ruthie, and her brother, Dan Lawson.



My cousin, Wes, and Ava together. Wes will also graduate from college in 2009! He attends Bluefield State in West Virginia.




Cousin Jennifer holds Miss Ava. :)



My Cousin, Ian, Jennifer's son, holding Ava.



Cousin Julie with Ava