Croup Tent

Well, it turns out that Miss Ava has some croup that developed from a cold that she had caught a few weeks back. It's very mild, and the doctor said that she should be over it in a few days. In the meantime, we're applying Vicks vapor rub (boy, that brought back memories when I smelled it!) and running the humidifier. She's better today and isn't coughing as much. I'll post more pictures from Christmas, tomorrow hopefully!

Oh, and I have not heard a peep from USCIS.

Countdown to 2009 is here!!

Direct Contact False Alarm

Hi! I just checked my e-mail and saw "Memphis Congressional" as a sender. That is the e-mail address coming straight from USCIS in Memphis. I do believe it took me a solid minute to open it. I was preparing my heart and asking God to just hold my hand as I read whatever it had to say, which I assumed was their decision.

Well, I laughed as I opened it. It just read, "I have sent your request to the Supervisor." Well, ok. I had to emotionally decompress there for a moment. You know, I think that this is honestly causing some stress in me subconsciouly. I've made peace with whatever the decision is, but I think it's the not knowing that's weighing on me. I tend to hold my emotions with something this huge and then release them like a dam gushing with water. Whew. Breathe. Maybe we'll hear something today or tomorrow? I assure everyone that as soon as I know anything, something, everything, I'll post!!!

Ava's Christening

Ava wore my 1974 Christening gown. She kept trying to eat the long ribbons during the ceremony! :) I went to Belk and bought a little pair of white silk shoes for her to wear and keep.



We awoke December 22nd to a beautiful, sunny morning. Believe it or not, it was stangely warm enough in December to wear short sleeves! This was the morning of Ava's Christening and Ben and I began to get everything ready to go to church. When we arrived, friends and family and our dear friend, Patty, who introduced us to Ava's birth family, had all gathered at the church. My grandmother, who has Alzheimer's, was able to come, and I was tickled that she could be there.

Video cameras and cameras were handed out, and Patty, me and Ben went into a Sunday School room and changed Ava into my 1974 Christening gown. I took it to the cleaners the week before to get the 70s off of the lace collar! :) Everyone was so excited to see this long-awaited day in our family! I sincerely wanted to find every face of those who have walked this long journey with us and supported us and petioned the Lord on our behalf. There are SO many. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. You were the body of Christ for us when we were barely hanging in there. We're forever grateful.


Here's me and Ben in the moment!



Our Pastor reads the meaning of the Christening as we listen. I am so overjoyed in this picture!



Pastor Jerry takes Ava for a stroll down the aisle...Notice the long ribbons!



My family gathers to celebrate with us! My grandmother, Ruthie, is pictured in front.



Our little family with Patty, who introduced us to Ava's birth family while I was working at Sweet Celebrations Bakery.




A picture with Pastor Jerry.



Posing with Ava's great-grandmother, Ruthie.




Posing with Ava's grandparents, Mimi and Papa. Ben's folks were unable to make it but were rejoicing with us! We saved the ceremony video to show them when they visit in January.



After the church service, Mommy, Daddy and Ava Faith pose for a family picture. Next, we went to Courtyard Grill for lunch with my family and opened gifts. Thank you, everyone!!!





A Christening or baptism in the Methodist church takes place early on in a child's life to allow the parents to affirm their Christian faith and promise to raise their child with the knowledge of Jesus Christ until the child makes the personal decision to invite Jesus into his/her heart. We met with Pastor Jerry a few days before and discussed the meaning behind the ceremony and why were were doing it. My greatest prayer for Ava is that she will grow up to define herself and find her indentity in what Christ thinks of her, not in what the world thinks. The world has so many opinions, doesn't it, and it's loud. I know now that we live in this world, but we are not of it. Now that I'm in my 30s, I've realized that the world can be a harsh place to journey in, but Jesus is always with us and making us stronger. I pray that Ava will grow in this knowledge, and Ben and I promised to do all that we can to help her on this journey. As we said the words and pledged our faith, I was so aware that storms and doubts and questions will come to Ava. How I want to shield her from those storms, but I know full well now that they are going to be necessary for her to grow. Ben and I promise to be there when those times come.

I've heard the words of Christenings countless times as we've watched baby after baby being baptized. When we walked up there to begin the ceremony, I just wanted to freeze time and find every face that had been praying earnestly for us and petitioning the Lord on our behalf. I was now a momma and Ben was a Daddy through the miracle of adoption.

The ceremony was beautiful surrounded by Christmas lights and the Advent wreath, and Ava was sprinkled with warm water. Next, our pastor took her and walked her down the aisle for the congregation to see. Again, this was a moment I have been waiting for for a very very long time. I wanted to shout to all who were there about our story of adoption and how God redeems our struggle for His glory and give us the treasures of darkness in His timing. All of that waiting and pew crying and sobbing just vanished as we stood there and watched Ava.

I'm preparing to upload several pictures. It will take me some time to get them in the right order! As I have a lot of catching up to do with you guys, we'll start with December 22nd and go from there. It was a glorious Christmas season!

Ava's dr. appt. is at 5:10 today. She's napping quietly as I write this with her humidifier blowing full blast! I'll feel better having taken her to the dr. to be checked out. She had a mild temp this morning of 99.5. I think it might be the croop or a mild bronchial infection.

Enjoy the pictures! I'll be back soon to post Christmas celebration pictures with friends and family!

Catch Up Time!

Hey, everybody!

I'll be catching up tomorrow on the posts and pictures! First, though, I'll probably be going to the dr. with Ava as I suspect that she has the croop. She's happy as a lark, but she sounds pretty hoarse. ugh.

Talk to you soon! :) E

Checking In...

Hi, everyone,

Well, we're still waiting to hear from USCIS possibly today (Tuesday). I'm thinking that it will likely be after Christmas before we get an answer to our request. I'm not anxious or fearful. I'm just waiting...we'll do what is necessary.

In the meantime...we're getting ready to celebrate Christmas! I have some great pictures to post from the week and from Ava's Christening yesterday! She was a little trooper, and the service was really wonderful. Ben and I both got teary but amazingly, I managed to hold it together! :)

I'll do my best to get on tomorrow and post some Christmas pictures for everyone.

Oh, and Ava had her 4 month pediatrician visit on Friday. She's now...

16lbs 6 oz
24 inches long
41 cm head circumference

She's right on track and will start cereal this week! I'm sure that will be interesting!

Be back soon! Hope everyone is experiencing Christmas cheer. To those of you in places with severe weather, I'm praying that you have relief soon and you're staying warm.

A Little Burl Ives Cheer!

Merry Wonderful Christmas to everyone today! Burl Ives always cheers me up! He's now the first song on my playlist. Breath of Heaven is second. This is a more somber song, but I think it's so beautiful, as I, like Mary, need the breath of Heaven to hold me together many times along this journey.

Still waiting to hear from USCIS...I'm not losing heart. :) Whatever comes, may I say, "It is well."

So, on a happier note, Ava's Christening is this coming Sunday at the 11:00 service. I'm busy getting things ready and am pretty sure that I will be an emotional wreck, as I've watched baby after baby being Christened through the years, crying silent tears in the pews and (seemingly never having Kleenex), longing for it to be ours.

I'll have someone take some pictures for us during the service so I can post some.

As for video right now, the software that came with the video camera is a little difficult to navigate, and Ben and I (or I should say Ben) is still working on that for us! Hopefully, we'll figure this out soon!

Here's a cute picture of Ava for Christmas - one of my favorite shots of her!

Sent in Good Faith

I just wanted to update everyone that I completed the Letter of Appeal to USCIS this morning and just sent it to the Supervisor in charge of our case at USCIS Memphis.

I'm trusting that if our request is denied and we have to walk down this very difficult paperwork road again, that God has a reason behind it that only He can know.

Breathing deep,

Emily

I promise I'll get back to posting pictures soon. Right now, I'm just trying to keep my head above water.

Joy and Perseverance

Hi, everyone,

I wanted to upload a fun Christmas picture of Ava for you to see! I'll upload more as the week/weekend goes on.

I'm afraid that I have been absent from posting since earlier this week as we've had a bit of turmoil at our house. Everything is somewhat calming down now, or maybe it's me that's calming down. If you're around me long, you know that I'm a passionate and emotional person and it takes me some time to settle. Ben would definitely agree with me here. Good thing he's not posting! :) It's just the way I am. My emotions have been strong, to say the least, this week. Here's an update...

We've had another major setback with our China adoption, details that are very complex involving red-tape and beaurocracy. Day by day, I'm ironing out the details of what we need to do, and Ben and I are in the process of writing an appeal letter to USCIS this weekend because they rejected our I-600A (the US approval to bring Maia home).

Their reasoning is because we were issued a non-valid US official approval in July of 2007 that said "amended July 26, 2007." I was told this week that this was in error and that it was based only on our renewal of our fingerprinting in Nashville. This was an oversight on their part, not ours, as we've been so very diligent and have been careful to turn over any rocks for hidden problems throughout this entire process.

Even though it was a mistake on their part, they are claiming that we now have to file and I-800A which means we have to redo our medicals, background checks, financial reports, home study, letters of employment, and complete 10 hours of Pre-Hague training. Hague is what regulates intercountry adoptions right now. China is a member of the Hague convention.

As you can imagine, after 2 years and 7 months of filing paperwork and paying fee after fee for this and that, Ben and I were shellshocked to learn of this this week.

Please pray for the Lord to go before us and for Him to make the crooked places straight and the rough places smooth. Everything in my human eye right now looks like a tangled mess, and again, we are up against a huge obstacle to bring her home.

I trust; I do. It's just so scary for me as I navigate through all of this potential paperwork again.

Before this started this week, we were 1 document away after Ava's adoption from being completely finished. That document arrived on Friday of this week.

I'll keep everyone updated as this progresses. We should hear something back from USCIS maybe the latter part of this coming week.

I'll upload some fun Christmas pics of Ava soon. We put up our Christmas tree last night! :) I don't want this to rob us of our joy with spending our first Christmas with Ava!

Hanging in there,

Emily

Need a Little Hope?

Please pause the playlist music on the right side of the blog.


This particular Christmas hope video is near and dear to my heart for obvious reasons, and I wanted to share it with you. I think what Steven says at the end about there being a hope of things to come hits the nail on the head. All of us remember those we've loved who've passed on, and we long for that hope out there. I know that when I struggled with the questions about the loss of three babies before Ava and Maia, this hope is what utterly sustained me. Every fiber of my being trusts and hopes in what is to come because I have Jesus in my life. I now rejoice because of that hope. I live in the present and I hope for my eternal home where there will be great reunions and celebration. I really do believe that.

Here's passing some hope on to you today. :)

Hope does not disappoint...

Emily

More Thanksgiving Celebrations!

Ava meets Uncle Chuck for the first time.



Auntie Jenn sharing some special time with Ava.



Having fun with cousin Chase



Cousin Evan loves babies!



Cousins together!



Well, today is a day of wreath hanging, humidifiers, (Ava still has the sniffles) picking out Christmas cards on Snapfish (yes, there are a million to choose from!), visiting with my 70 something neighbor who just dropped by to give Ava a little handmade mailbox to hang on the tree, eating a corndog and hummus (do those even go together? In my kitchen, they do!) and playing with Ava and petting the cats. Pretty full day, and it's only 3:30! :)

I set some goals for today ( you know that simplifying thing I'm working on) and so far, so good. I'm not moving through these goals at mock speed, but I'm getting there ever so slowly. I'm learing that simplying takes TIME! I do wish a clean out fairy would come to my closets and just take over! ugh.

I said I'd post Thanksgiving two pictures and some more of Ava's cousins and aunt and uncle, so I'm going to do that! Tomorrow, I'll share another video from the Billy Graham Christmas special, which, by the way, was on some crazy channel 10News2 at 7:00 which we don't have!! I had to settle for on-line viewing instead of a well thought out sit on the couch with Ben and Ava and drink hot chocolate viewing.

So without further ramblings, here are some more Thanksgiving pics!

Ava meets Great Grandma Cook for the first time!




Cousin Evan feeding Ava.



Jaimie, cousin Ray's girlfriend, making Ava smile.



Thanksgiving mingling at Aunt Margaret and Uncle Russ's house.



Enjoying family after the Thanksgiving meal.



Cousin Monica and Grandma

Bringing the Hope of Christmas To Others

Before you watch any of the videos, please pause the playlist music on the righthand side of the blog where you see the list of songs.





Good cold afternoon,

We took Miss Ava to church today in a candy stripe outfit and hat and sat on the back pew with bottles and car seat and kleenex and diaper bags. What did I not bring with me?! :) As we listened and worshiped, I looked down at her so many times during the service just rejoicing in my heart for the amazing gift of her life in my life. As I looked around at the abundance and the plenty for the children in the service today, I was reminded that there are so many children in our communities, next door and around the world that need to know that someone cares and that someones thinks they are special just because of who they are. I wish I could send every orphan or hurting child a big gift of love this Christmas and tell them that Jesus loves them so very much and that are valued and worthy and important.

I don't just wish that for the children, though. I wish it for the child within each of us as adults, adults who have had much contact with this broken world and adults who have had more than their share of wounds and hurts.

I mentioned the Billy Graham Christmas special coming on tonight at 7:00, and I know that there are many people who won't have a chance to see it or catch it while it's on.

So... I thought I'd bring a little bit of Christmas to you through my blog! I know that I know many of my readers (hey, guys, I love you!) but I also know that I may not know some of you out there who are walking through a hard time this Christmas season. I desperately want to share the light of Christ with you in any way that I can. I have known and walked through darkness so deep and thick that I thought that I would suffocate. I have held it together on more than one occasion, and I have experienced loss and heartache that shook my faith to its core. Having said that, I am so much more in tune now than every before to others who are hurting. We all hurt in one way or another at times. There is light in the midst of that darkness, even if the only place you can feel it is deep deep down inside your heart. It's there burning and shining. Jesus Christ is my hope- He's it entirely. I'm in love with a Man who has forever changed my life and called me daughter, who has taken my hurt and brokeness upon Himself and called me righteous! Wow! What a concept that is for me to get my arms around!

Here is a little bit of the show that will air tonight. I pray that you'll watch it and know two things. One, that God can take any life and make it extraordinary and two, that He knows your name and loves you in the midst of your brokenness, your past, your present and your future.

My plan is to share one each day this week to encourage your heart, so keep checking back!

Love to all,

Emily

Must See!

Can I tell you that I am SO excited to see the Billy Grahm Christmas Special this weekend?!

This is not usually something I remember to watch, but this year is extra special. If you live near us, it's on tomorrow night at 7:00 on WBIR. If you live anywhere else in the U.S. it can be found on one of your local stations. Scroll down the right side of my blog to "special blogs I follow" and click on the link that takes you to the airing schedule. It will show you a map of the US. Click on your state, and your airing station and time will be shown.

It really is supposed to be spectacular this year, and to be honest, I already took a sneak peak and was so inspired and encouraged. I needed a big dose of that this week, and this is perfect timing!

Plus, Steven Curtis Chapman is featured this year telling about little Maria Sue and the hope that they have after her tragic accident.

So... please join me in watching this special! I think it will bless your socks off and remind all of us how simple Christmas really is.

A thousand blessings,

Emily

A Celebration of Thanksgiving!

*** 10:37 If you're checking back, I think I have everything straight now! Whew!

It's Thanksgiving! These pictures were taken on Thanksgiving Day with the Nibali side of the family. We had a wonderful time gathering as family and introducing the newest member! Ava was a trooper throughout the day, and as you can see, she was in many people's arms!

Great Aunt Barb meets Ava for the first time...



Great Aunt Diane and Ava



Great Uncle Rich and Ava



Great Uncle Mike and Ava



Great Uncle Jim and Ava



We are presented with a beautiful ceramic ornament mobile for Ava to keep! The sportscasters to the left were also in on the excitement! ha!



Each family member wrote a good wish or scripture verse on the ornaments.



Great Uncle Jeff reads his message to Ava.



Great Uncle Phil reads his family's message...



The annual Thanksgiving Turkey!



Cousins, Chase and Evan, make Thanksgiving turkeys with Great Uncle Jeff.




Great Uncle Jeff presents his turkey - one of his favorite traditions.



We also received a highchair for Ava! Thank you all!



We gather together to ask the Lord's blessing and express our thanks for the bounty before us.



The family! Auntie Jenn is holding Miss Ava! More pics of cousins, Evan and Chase and Uncle Chuck to come! We accidentally forgot our camera the night we went over to visit them!



To all the aunts and uncles and cousins: THANK YOU so much for your joy, excitement and encouragement! Who knew when you all contributed to Maia's 100 Good Wishes quilt that Ava would soon be on the way! :)

I'll post Thanksgiving TWO pictures soon with the Cook side of the family and possibly some video sometime this weekend hopefully.

Hope everyone is enjoying this glorious Christmas season! My goal is to simplify this year. I'll let you know how I do! :) Ava and I are hanging out today catching up on many things and making sausage gravy for a breakfast party tonight with friends!

Thankful Hearts

We took SO many pictures, so I'll post separately for the days we were in Maryland. These pictures were taken the day before Thanksgiving.

Uncle Vince meets Ava for the first time!



Grandaddy having some fun time with Ava.



Grandma having bottle time with Ava.



In the depths of my heart lies a place that is forever grateful to the Lord. It's not any one thing I'm grateful for, really. It's SO many things. I could list them out here, but it would take awhile! I'm sure your list is pretty long, too!

I thought of something, though, this morning that I forget to thank the Lord for sometimes. It is this...

Pursuing me in the wilderness....

I often reflect on why it is that when one prayer, tiny or huge, has been answered that my spirit can again become tense and self-focused and wishing for freedom from this or that. I suddenly find myself in a wilderness scratching my way around in the brambles and bushes of life and expectations and obligations, and I grow thirsty - thirsting for living water that I have learned is really the only means of true and lasting refreshment and the only source of my true identity. Nothing else, even good things, can ever completely satisfy. I need Him just as much as I did before He blessed our family with Ava Faith.

I need Him constantly in my everyday everything.

Today and everyday, as I take off the cloak of perfection that is often wrapped around my shoulders, I'll need Him.

I recently read In Streams in the Desert the story of a woman who was an anxious and troubled Christian. She had a dream one night that she was walking along a road with a lot of other people who also seemed very tired and burdened. She then saw that they were carrying little black bundles that were littering the road and being dropped by creatures quite demonic looking. More and more were being dropped and she, too, was stooping the pick them up and carry them.

After some time, she looked up and saw a Man whose face was loving and bright as He moved through the crowd, comforting the people. He then said to her, "My dear child, these bundles you carry are not from me, and you have no need of them. They are the Devil's burdens, and they are wearing out your life. You need to drop them and simply refuse to touch them with even one of your fingers. Then you will find your path easy, and you will feel as if 'I carried you on eagles's wings.' (Ex. 19:4)

So, I began to think about Him pursuing me in the wildernesses of this world. Today, it was a phone call from a dear friend who spoke truth to me in the midst of my self-focusing. I believe the Lord comforts us and speaks to us through the body of Christ, and I am so thankful for His provision for me today.

I thought of the little black bundles I maybe have been carrying.

I'm so grateful that He never leaves me in one place completely satisifed and that when I get off track, He is ever gentle and patient to bring me back.

He's there to take my cloak of perfection off and remove the black bundles from my fingers.

So, these are just some thoughts I was having today and wanted to share in hopes that you might be encouraged to continue this walk with strength and hope that He's with you and pursuing your woman's heart in the mist of any wildernesses that you find yourself in at the moment.

I'll post Thanksgiving Day pictures very soon.

12 Hours!

Hi, everyone!

Well, a drive that usually takes us about 8 hours quickly turned into about a 12 hour drive yesterday!!We ran into some of the heaviest holiday traffic we've ever seen, and there were several accidents due to heavy and light rain along the way.

We stopped at Cracker Barrel for a long stop for Ava and at Arby's a little closer to Tennessee. We finally rolled into the driveway about 12:00 a.m. and we were SO glad to be home.

Ava is still sick with a little cold but was unbelievably good on the ride home. Ben and I just held our breath about the 9th hour!

I'm still unpacking and trying to figure out what's for supper, so I'll post some pictures a little later on.

On a suprising note, Ava and I woke up to a mini-blizzard in the valley this morning - very unusual for December 1st! Maybe this is a sign we'll get more snow this year. It was so pretty.

I hope everyone had a safe and happy Thanksgiving! I'll post pics soon!

Coming Home Sunday!

Hi, everybody!

Well, I'm sitting here on the couch in my fuzzy white robe with a few second to type something! We're having a great time and are gearing up for T2 near Saverna Park, MD - Thanksgiving two with Ben's Mom's side of the family tonight. It's pretty chilly here today with a high expected of about 42 degrees I think. It's been very relaxing, and we're starting to get things together for our drive home tomorrow which usually takes us close to 10 hours with holiday traffic! Ugh!

On another note, Miss Ava has her first cold and is a little under the weather. We went out late last night and got Little Noses to help her breathe a little better. She's a real trooper, though. Even being sick, she's still smiling! She's sleeping in the same room with us, and Ben and I were up last night checking on her every once in awhile. She's having trouble breathing through her nose, so sucking her thumb has been a little tricky!

I'm excited to post some Thanksgiving pictures when we get home! Please pray for our drive home if you're reading this - that it will be uneventful, and Ava will be comfortable.

Love and Thanksgiving to all!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

Tomorrow, we're headed eight hours north to West Friendship, Maryland to visit Ben's family this week and introduce Miss Ava! I'll post some pictures when I get back!

I am so grateful for this season, but I must be honest and tell you that I'm also so grateful for the very difficult season that was eight years of my life, as I know that it left me humbled, stronger and clinging to the hope that is my Savior. He is very near to those who have a broken heart and a contrite spirit. I know that full well. In this broken world that we live in, He's so good, and He's so faithful.

Praise God from Whom all blessings flow!

Love everyone,

Emily

Ava is 3 Months Old!

First, I finally found the song that spoke to my heart SO many times during the last eight years. It's "In the Waiting" by Greg Long, the first song now on my playlist. I don't remember the first time I heard it, but everytime I caught it on the radio, tears would stream down my face because I was so "In the Waiting." This song is dedicated to any of my readers who are also "In the Waiting" and who are praying for a peace that passeth all understanding. Most of all, I want you to know that it's ok for you to be in that place...His strength in you will come in that precious time...

Three months ago, Ava had just been born at 1:56 a.m, and here I was as the adoptive Mom following this little bundle down the hallway into the nursery. I think this picture was taken close to 3:00 a.m. This picture captures so much for me- the waiting, the longing, the surprise and astonishment and the peace and expectation all wrapped up together. I had a special bracelet that allowed me to come into the nursery. I kept it to show Ava one day.



Now, three months later, Ava and Saki are lounging on the couch together! My special bracelet has been put away for safe keeping. I think Saki gets the good sport kitty award this week! Notice that Lucy, the other cat, is not pictured! She's sulking somewhere in the corner...







Me and Ava hanging out in the nursery. I kept trying to get a one handed camera shot of the two of us!



I can't believe that Ava is already three months old! It seems like yesterday when Ben and I were bringing her home from GA! She's babbling away now and holding her head up like a pro. I have some video I'm going to try to upload this morning. Ben usually does that, so I need to figure this out!

Her favorite thing to look at right now is fans! We're having a slow Saturday. I got all of my thank you notes completed yesterday! Again, I am SO GRATEFUL for all of the warm wishes and generous gifts for Ava.

On another note, I drove twenty minutes to the airport last night to tell the Kato family goodbye. I called Ben afterwards and told him that it felt like a piece of my heart broke off. I am going to miss that family SO much. Please pray for them if you're reading this. I know the Lord answers our prayers in His timing, and I don't want to stop praying for them to know Him.

Ok! Enjoy the pictures and video if I can get it uploaded!

Miss Independence

Just in the last few days, Ava has started "holding" her bottle while we feed her. She'll hold it for a few minutes at a time. She is very strong and insists on putting her hands on the bottle! :)

I'm at home today writing thank you notes and catching up on some paperwork and such. Ava is babbling away as I write this post. I hope to upload some video soon of her noises!

Hope everyone is having a blessed day! I hope to post a longer post soon. Martha, my plan is to send you a "thoughtful" e-mail today. I've been pondering some things I wanted to share with you. :) Amy, I posted on your blog which I discovered today! We have GOT to catch up! I was drooling at your Japan pictures!

Looking Up!

Ava had tummy time yesterday and held her head up for the first time!



This picture just cracks me up! I had the flash on, and Ava's blue eyes really stand out! Here, we were having some "look at Mommy's crazy facial expressions time."



Good morning, everyone!

Monday is underway, and it feels like I have a thousand things to do! Anyone else out there feeling that? I am making a conscious choice, though, to try not get anxious and fretful about all of it. Most of the "things I have to do" are not as important as I often make them out to be! Perfection rearing its ugly head lately....

I'm aware of making a deliberate choice to simplify this holiday season and concentrate on family and friends. I'm trying my best to keep up with a Beth Moore Stepping Up Bible study with some women on Wednesdays, and I just want to sit and soak up the words I'm hearing - to look to Him who is enthroned above me and enthroned over all that I "have to do" and keep my eyes focused on Him.

How quickly my eyes can look down at the rather large plate before me. I watch myself as I pick up my fork and place this and that on the plate. Sometimes, I place things on my plate, and other times, other people place things on my plate! Know what I'm talking about?

The other day, I quickly became stressed about getting Ava's announcements finished, Christmas cards and Christening invitations picked out, thank you notes written and sent and making a Christmas stocking. Good grief! That plate looks pretty full! I won't tell you some of the things I was spooning onto my plate in addition to all of that! I knew something in my spirit was off, so I stopped and said, "Whoah." What is it I really have to do? The answer came back as love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and mind and others as myself. I didn't hear anything about perfect holiday decorating or the perfect baby announcment in there anywhere! Whew! What a relief!

When I look to Him and let Him define my "perfection" it's easier to let go of some of the "have tos." Right now, I have to fix my eyes on Him to get back on track and not try to keep up with my own crazy expectations of myself! Anyone else have crazy expectations of yourself, especially at this time of year?

My goal in the next weeks ahead is to be thankful and grateful for all that God has given to me and helped me through and to worship the newborn King... Two things on my plate.... The other things are really just sides and pats of butter. I'll get to those.

Lord, please help me focus on the main course this holiday season. May God bless each of you in the coming weeks.